On Anger and Grief

My rage and fear rocketed around the inside of my skull, knocking my mental order out of place and causing general havoc in my mental sanctuary.

HOW COULD SHE HAVE SAID THOSE THINGS!

"She MUST be a fraud! She MUST be wrong!" I told myself time and time again as I paced, back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. What did I bloody care if the damn attendant below woke up?

But I couldn't accept that. That voice, that damn voice of my holy conscience, wouldn't let me just let the matter go.

It was a bloody paradox, that what it was. She had said those... THINGS that couldn't possibly have been based on her inner "mentalist." BUT SHE HAD NO WAY OF KNOWING THEM!

WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?

I needed clarity. I needed order. Here I am, interjecting myself into chaos (how many of the people in this building have mental issues, for God's sake!), and that chaos has now spread to my own mind.

Unless....

This is a test. I must go with this flow. Could she be......... ooooooooooooooo? That would be clever! What a cover! Hehe. Alright. I shall continue in my duty. Still, that was unfair, the way the Authority pulled that. And with that, I thought it high time to send a few.. mementos back where I had come from. Give them a taste of the commerical hades they had sent me.

There was a gift shop, after all.

"Hello!" said Karen. "Welcome to the gift shop! How may I help you today?"

"Errrr.." Saul was slightly put back at her happiness. How could anyone here by happy?

"Well!" said Karen, filling the could-have-been-awkward pause with another cheery note, "we have several lovely items for any of your needs. Over to the left, you may see the t-shirts peeking out from behind the jackets. We have them in.."

"Thank you, but I don't really need to know the range of sizes," Saul sneered. "You see, my body typically stays one size and shape, Karen."

"But we haven't met, have we?" Karen inquired. "You already saw my name-tag, may I know your name sir?"

"Errr, right.... I'll be, ah...," Saul trailed off.

"Bye! Have a nice day!" Karen said to the retreating figure.

I had seen pointlessly pessimistic people; they could be pitied. But this, I had no idea what to make of it. Surely she was losing here, losing life and hope and cold cash into this store. Like that root shop. What an idiot venture...

How could anyone be so joyful here? Joy, in my experience, didn't typically abide on such dreary street corners.

I walked out, into my old friend the darkness, the dying dreary daytime of twilight. Down the street, to my sanctuary. We are all welcome here, even him. Even evil.